Shocking New Web Poll Technology

Website polling technology has fortunately been upgraded significantly by Apparel Search.  The company has recently developed a new online poll technology that will undoubtedly receive rave reviews from industry professionals that rely on "accurate" polls to conduct business activities and decision making. 

 

Let's face it, when utilizing a poll for research, business, or educational purposes the accuracy of the poll is extremely critical.  Most certainly, we do not want people making random selections that are not based on "true" personal opinions.  In an effort to keep the poll answers accurate, Apparel Search has designed a system that will significantly reduce the number of illegitimate answers from web poll participants.

 

What is this new web poll technology called:

 

The official name of this new technology is the "Poll Cheat Blocker ML2.0"

 

What this new web poll technology achieves:

 

If a poll taker submits an answer that does not truly match their opinion, they will most likely NOT do this again when using a website that is running the Poll Cheat Blocker ML2.0 technology from Apparel Search.  Yes, it is possible that they will submit one incorrect answer.  However, repeat violations may become a thing of the past.

 

How this new web poll technology works:

 

When Poll Cheat Blocker ML2.0 is actively running on a fashion website, the software will give a rather significant electric shock to users that do not submit accurate answers to the poll system.  When we say "accurate" answers, we mean answers that truly match the users own personal opinions.  Essentially, the software combines lie detector technology along with shock therapy to train users not to cheat on polls.

 

For example, imagine a fashion poll that is asking, "What is your favorite color shoe?".  The poll offers four colors for making your selection.  The choices are blue, black, red, and polka dots.  If you think you are funny and answer, "polka dots", you will surely be sent a bolt of electricity.  Clearly, polka dots are not an actual color classification.  Therefore, you lied and you were shocked.

 

OK, that polka dot color example may not be the best example.  With this example, it was too easy to know that the user was not telling the truth.  In reality, the Poll Cheat Blocker ML2.0 is much more clever than this example illustrates.  Here is another example to help show the power of the system.

 

Imagine a fashion poll asking, "What is your favorite fashion brand?".  The poll lists the choices of Polo, Versace, Prada, Burberry, & Armani.  Now, this gets complicated... The user taking the poll actually loves the Burberry brand (it is actually their favorite).  However, they work in the sales department selling Armani fashion so they click the Armani option in the hopes that the poll will influence more shoppers to by Armani.  The Poll Cheat Blocker ML2.0 system will sense the conflict of interest and send a shock to the user.  In summary, the poll user is punished for picking Armani for financial reasons and not selecting Burberry which they truly love.  Please note that the system does sense the severity of the lie.  If it is a minor white lie because you really did not know the best way to answer the question, you may receive no shock or a very light sensation.  However, if you are lying just for the sake of being a jerk, you may not be able to feel your fingers for a few days.

 

For users that like to click the submit button more then one time per poll, the keyboard will spray them in the face with water prior to delivering the electric shock.  This magnifies the shock so that the user will be certain not to make this error in judgment twice.

 

Note: This system does NOT require the user to sign up for an account nor does the system require a special keyboard.  The user can continue to utilize his or her own keyboard and mouse.  We will supply the electric shock and water from our end at no charge.

 

Poll Cheat Blocker ML2.0 runs on both MAC or PC.  The system is currently being developed to also work on portable devices.  Keep an eye out for our new fashion app coming soon.  The mobile application is currently in BETA testing.

 

Learn more about fashion polls on Apparel Search.

 

Note: At this time, the Poll Cheat Blocker ML2.0 only runs on fashion poll website.  If your poll is not regarding fashion or textiles, the system will unfortunately not work correctly.  Again, this is for fashion polls or fashion industry polls only.

 

Please note that the Apparel Search Company is not responsible for any injury or mess made in your home or office.

 

Although we can not tell you exactly how the system works (patents are possibly pending), we can assure you that the system works splendidly.  If you utilize fashion polls on your website to obtain research from your website viewers, you are welcome to test out the Poll Cheat Blocker ML2.0 software.

 

This new online poll technology will possibly be patented in the near future.  However, Apparel Search is not commenting on the status of patent applications or the lack their of such applications.  If you wish to receive more information regarding the status of patents, you are welcome to contact either the fashion princess or Mr. Santa at your earliest convenience.  You can possibly contact them via this link.

The Real Problem Behind the Joke

Survey researchers call the joke's target by drier names: careless responding, strategic answering and satisficing — picking an answer to finish rather than to inform. Online polls are the most exposed form, since they are self-selected, anonymous and consequence-free, and a motivated group can flood one for fun or advantage. The fictional device's examples are chosen well for that reason: the respondent who picks a joke option, and the salesperson who votes for the brand they sell rather than the brand they love, are the two classic corruptions of opinion data — noise and interest. Real polling defends itself less dramatically, with screening questions, attention checks, weighting and large samples that dilute individual mischief.

How to Read Any Poll on This Site

The practical lesson travels to every poll in this section. Results from an open web poll describe the people who chose to answer it — fashion-interested visitors, at a particular moment — and they are best used the way the industry uses them: as indications of where opinion leans and how strongly, not as measurements of a whole market. A result worth trusting shows a large margin, a sensible pattern across related questions, and stability when the question is asked again later. A result worth doubting is close, surprising in ways that flatter one interested party, or wildly different from its neighbors. Read that way, polls remain what they were designed to be: a quick, honest sampling of opinion — no electricity required.